As you're well aware, Feline American Pumpkin will be celebrating his sixth birthday on April 23rd. He was born on famous English playwright and poet William Skakespeare's birthday, so that's where he got the "William" in his name. Mom calls him Willie P. or William Pumpkin (or sometimes even William, Duke of Pumpkin or Punky the Monkey).
Anyway, since his birthday is next week, I thought that I'd do my Thursday Thirteen about the thirteen things that Pumpkin would like for his birthday ...
1. A huge bag of panties from Victoria's Secret. Pumpkin likes playing in them and/or rolling in them when they're fresh from the dryer. He acts silly and undignified. He DROOLS!
2. A nylon tricot full slip. Any color. For the same reason as #1.
3. Temptations® ... Mom's body weight in Temptations® might last about six months. Pumpkin LOVES Temptations®.
4. Pro Active Solution. Pumpkin is a cat-acne sufferer. I sometimes call him "Pizza Face" or "Vesuvius".
5. Supersize scratching post/cat condo for the master bedroom.
6. More Whirly-Bird birdies.
7. A case of double-A batteries for the laser beam toy and unlimited "Mom time" to play.
8. The catfood formerly known as Sheba is mass quantities.
9. A ginormous fish tank for the master bedroom with big, colorful fish to watch and "fishing" privileges.
10. An exemption from clippy claws.
11. An exemption from brushing.
12. An exemption from wonk removal. (WONK is the brown crust that gathers in the inner corners of your eyes.)
13. Scrunchees made of nylon parachute material to replace the ones that got "funky" from too many games of fetch.