Life is my litterbox ... Grab the SCOOP!

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Stupidity on Sunday ...

One of Mom's teacher-friends sent this group of newspaper headlines to Mom 'cuz its further proof that 'beans don't necessarily understand the language that they SUPPOSEDLY speak/read/write fluently.  Do you agree??

Proof Readers a Dying Breed
This should really say:  Proof-readers a Dying Breed (Jessica)

Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter
This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this.  It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!!!  They put in a correction the next day.  

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
 No, really? Ya think?

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers 
 Now that's taking things a bit far!

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over 
What a guy!  

Miners Refuse to Work after Death
 Good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-so's!
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant 
See if that works any better than a fair trial!

War Dims Hope for Peace 
 I can see where it might have that effect!

 If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
Ya think?!

Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures 
Who would have thought!?!

Enfield (  London  ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide  
They may be on to something!

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges 
You mean there's something stronger than duct tape? Oklahoma's new construction program!?!

Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge 
He probably IS the battery charge!

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group 
Weren't they fat enough?!

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft 
That's what he gets for eating those beans!

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks 
Do they taste like chicken?

 Local  High School Dropouts Cut in Half 
Chainsaw Massacre all over again!

Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors (This one IS correct, but "podiatrists" would have been better!)
Boy, are they tall!

And the winner is.... 

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead 
 Did I read that right?


Cheysuli and gemini said...

Okay you had the Woman at Astronaut takes blame for Gas in Spacecraft...

Fin said...

Ha ha ha, so funny!

Pablo said...

One of my beans is a proofreader; so she got some extra-big laughs out of those.

Zoey and the furballs (the Zoo Crew) said...

Oh my goodness, those were hilarious!

Boy n Beethoven said...

Hahahaha....but of course....beans can't wead or wwite as well as us!


Eduardo said...

OMD! That was so funny! I'm going to send you an e-mail today! Sorry it took so long Mommy is lazy!
Hugs & Snugs
Eduardo the Snuggle Puggle

Zippy, Sadie and Speedy said...

We were going to let mom comment but she can't stop laffing long enuff. Yeah, we know our spelling and grammer are atroosis but we'z cats...hoomans should know better!

The Devil Dog said...

Ohhh, those are very funny. Thanks


Gizmo said...

LOL. Those were good! Mommy likes things like that when Jay Leno does them on his tv show.

Samantha and Mr. Tigger said...

Oh my gosh~~ Mom is laughing so hard she is crying!! Thanks for sharing those with us!!
Your FL furiends,