DaisyMae's "Word of the Day": WALK-BY GWABBING

Here's another informative vocabulary lesson to build your FELINE LEXICON ...

From DaisyMae's Feline Dictionary of Terms and Phrases, the phrase of the day is:

WALK-BY GWABBING (noun) ... wah-k bye gwahb-bing ... A subtle sneak-attack made by a human on a feline when the human wants to do something to the feline that the feline doesn't like and would otherwise hide to avoid (ie. clippy claws, combing, Advantage application, dingleberry removal).

Sentence example:
1. Mom instituted a walk-by gwabbing on Cocoa Puff because he had poo-poo feet and dingleberries that needed immediate attention.
2. Despite the walk-by gwabbing, DaisyMae Maus was still slippery enough to evade Mom and avoid clippy claws ... for about five minutes.

The Feline Americans' favorite Christmas story

Mom had this wonderful little Christmas book from when she was a very little girl, but as she grew older, the book disappeared. A few years ago, she found a reprint of the book at a Borders bookstore and had to buy it to share with us. The new copy is missing the sandpapery feel on the cover that the original book had and it's missing the color crayon squiggles that Mom's brother made in the book when he was a tiny boy, but the story is the same. It's our favorite ... So here, without permission of the author (yep, being naughty), is the story of "Santa Mouse."

The Story of Santa Mouse
By Michael Brown

Once there was a little mouse, who didn't have a name.
He lived in a great big house, this mouse,
the only mouse in the whole wide house.
He day-dreamed he had playmates who were friendly as could be.
The little girls would bring their dolls, and dress up and have tea.
The boys would play at cowboys or Eskimo or Spanish.
But when he tried to touch them like a bubble they would vanish.
Now through the years this little mouse
had saved one special thing.
A piece of cheese -- the kind that makes an angel want to sing.
And so that night as he brushed his teeth
and washed his tiny paws.
He said my goodness no-one gives a gift to Santa Claus.
So he ran to get his piece of cheese and after he had found it,
Some paper from some chewing gum he quickly wrapped around it.
And then he climbed in bed and dreamed that he was lifted high,
And woke up to find that he was looking right in Santa's eye.
Thank you for my gift he said now tell me what's your name,
I haven't any said the mouse.
You haven't, that's a shame.
You know I need a helper as I travel house to house.
And I shall give a name to you, I'll call you Santa mouse.
So here's your beard and here's your suit
and here's each tiny shiny boot.
You mustn't sneeze and you mustn't cough,
Now put them on and we'll be off.
Then over all the rooftops on a journey with no end,
Away they went together, Santa and his tiny friend.
And so this Christmas if you please,
Beneath that tree that's in your house,
Why don't you leave a piece of cheese.
You know who'll thank you,
SANTA MOUSE!

Thursday Thirteen #1!

I've been wantin' to participate in the "Thursday Thirteen" for about six months, but Mom wouldn't approve a single one of my suggestions.

What's wrong with "Thirteen different shapes of litterbox poops" or the "Thirteen items in the house that Fudgie HASN'T peed on"?

Mom said that those ideas weren't appropriate topics of conversation (let alone blog postings) to be made by "young lady cats" like myself. Bah. I think that she's just jealous that she hadn't thought of them first.

But after seeing the past two "Thursday Thirteens" posted by one of the most famous celebrity bloggers on the internet, Darling Millie herself, Mom has relented by approving today's topic: Snowmen!

A little background: Mom collects snowmen. She has LOTS of snowmen that she displays each and every Christmas (and adds to the horde each year).

As a rule, we've made it a policy to leave the snowmen alone ... That was until Lucky Charmz joined the Feline Americans three Christmases ago.

The following thirteen snowmen have been knocked down, tasted, rubbed up on, or otherwise bothered by Lucky Charmz in recent weeks and therefore, have been claimed as "favorites."


1. Postman Snowman: Mom made two of these last year and gave one to Joe, the man in the bloo shorts, who brings our packages.


2. Primative Snowman: A wooden gift that's much heavier than he looks (and far less tasty).


3. Blue Clay Snowman was selected when Mom was in her royal blue phase. Charmee likes how smooth he is. He's had the bitey put on him.


4. Patriotic Snowman: He was purchased for Christmas 2001 for obvious reasons.


5. Buckethead Stuffed Snowman came in a big purple bag from a place called "Hallmark" ... Charmee jumped into the bag with this snowman and got him furry.


6. This pair of Stuffed Snowman Children Mom bought this year because they coordinate with a fleece blanket that her colleague gave to her years ago. We like the fleece blanket, so by extention, we like the snowmen, too.


7. Snowball Snowman has been knocked on the floor at least a dozen times by Charmee. The Snowball Snowman is virtually indestructable by cats. Must be made of Kryptonite® or somethin'.


8. The "I Love Winter" snowman plaque hangs directly above the fishtank. Charmee likes to lay on top of the fishtank for two reasons: Menacing the fish and keeping toasty. When he stands on the fishtank lid and stretches, he can reach the plaque.


9. Brick Snowman was made by Mom at a craft party held by her area superintendent back in October. He (the snowman, natch) sits on MY fireplace hearth. I have cleaned my teeth on him claiming him as MINE. I also like his fleece ... very softy.


10. Plushy Snowman Family that hangs on the drapery rod represents Grandma and her brother/sisters. There are five snowmen and five siblings. It's high up enough that we can only look ... not touch.


11. Flakes Snowman ornament came from ... someone. We don't know who for sure, but we like this ornament because Mom is kinda flaky sometimes when she forgets our can of stinky goodness until it's really late at night or she accidentally locks one of us in the computer room. An' we like our flakes in a bowl with milk.


12. Grandpa Snowman was made at the same time as the Postman Snowman. Our grand-dad was in the US Navy for a long time. Mom's favorite picture of him was when he was about 18 years old, shaved bald, and wearin' a Dixie cup cap. We like it 'cuz it's grand-dad.


13. Snowman Sled is a favorite because the stupid vishus deer riding on the back of the snowman's sled isn't gonna be eating anything other than frozen water when he finally catches up to that snowman at the bottom. Vishus deer are stupid.




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