Uh, the indignities I have to suffer for beauty! Mom was home early today (after yesterday's fifteen plus hours at the job), so the Feline Americans and I got pedicures. Mom uses these tiny snapping clippers to trim our claws as close to the quick as she can manage. She thinks that it makes it less horrifying if she calls it "clippy claws," but let's call a spade a spade, huh? She's lopping off all eighteen of our finely honed digital pokers! Mine took me two weeks to grow and sharpen on the Alpine Scratcher! She doesn't see me slaving away on the corrugated cardboard day in and day out.
I understand that she HAD to do Cocoa Puff's because he'd gotten himself caught up on the back of the recliner (BAD cat! Use your scratcher!!!), but the rest of us were just minding our own business. In our defense, we did try to preserve our claws by evading Mom. Cocoa Puff was caught easily ... He's so big and slow that he's an easy target. His yowling alerted the rest of us, so we had a little time to find "hiding" places. Sparky Fuzzypants (he of the room-temperature-with-the-a/c-on IQ) "hid" in the middle of the kitchen. Duh! He got his claws trimmed second. He did try to wiggle away from Mom, but she held fast. Fudge Ripple, that little suck-up, held still and even got combed. He'll do anything if he thinks that it'll lead to something edible.
I was hiding on Mom's bed. I don't know how she found my black-and-white self on her red quilt. It will remain a mystery of animal camouflage ... How does she do it??
Mom saved Lucky Charmz for almost last because he typically covers her with his white fur (and it makes her sneeze). He was above the cabinets in the kitchen, so Mom climbed up on the counter and jabbed at him with the kitchen tongs to get him to stand up for the easy grab. He wanted some reciprocity for losing his claws, so he puckered up and Mom gave him a little kiss (SUCKER! Mom quickly discovered that Charmee's breath smelled like butt ... Yuck! That'll teach her, right? Nope, probably not.)
Pumpkin, the king of under-the-bed was last because rousting him requires moving of boxes, a flashlight, and sometimes more than two hands!). Pumpkin had some seriously long claws ... I think that he missed his "appointment" with Mom two weeks ago, so he had more growth with which to dig into the carpeting under the bed.
Ugh ... What's that whining noise?? Crap. Shadow's here ... the dipstick K-9 cousin. Gotta hide ...
Happy weekend, Efurrybody!