Friday's Feast #35

Appetizer
Who is the easiest person for you to talk to?

That one's easy ... My mom is the easiest one to talk to ... and she's always available.

Soup
If you could live in any ancient city during the height of the quality of its society and culture, which one would you choose?

All of the really good ancient cities were built places where it's HOT. I don't like HOT. I suppose that I'd choose Medieval Scotland ... It's not that ancient, but it's old enough.

Salad
What is the most exciting event you’ve ever witnessed?

I attended a Metallica concert in 1991. I was in the front row far on the right near Lars Ulrich's drum kit. He threw a drumstick into the audience that nearly hit me in the head. Does that count?

Main Course
If you were a celebrity, what would you do for a publicity stunt?

I'd give away $5,000.00 college scholarships ... in large numbers ... to deserving, yet needy, young adults. I'd sign the checks with pink ink ... Ooooo ... ahhhh ... Such an exciting life of celebrity ...

And I'd take a world-tour of animal shelters where I'd visit the residents and drum up forever homes for large numbers of kitties, woofies, an' buns.

Dessert
What do you consider the ideal age to have a first child?

For me? NEVER. I don't want kids.

For other people? Twenty-seven seems like a good age. College is finished. A relationship is established. Some maturity is evident. Financial security is beginning.

Thursday Thirteen #35: I'm too bummed to write somethin' good

This has been a trying and depressing week an' I just can't think of anything worthwhile to write about. Rather than write a "traditional" Thursday Thirteen, I have decided to do somethin' a little different ... I'm gonna publish one of my favorite jokes ... An' you can laugh thirteen times!

How to catch a polar bear:

Go up north and find a frozen lake or pond.
Cut a large hole in the ice.
Open a can of green peas, and place the peas around the edge of the hole single file.
Hide behind a nearby rock.
When the bear comes up to take a pea, kick him in the ice-hole!

1. Laugh
2. Laugh
3. Laugh
4. Laugh
5. Laugh
6. Laugh
7. Laugh
8. Laugh
9. Laugh
10. Laugh
11. Laugh
12. Snicker ....
13. Laugh one last time at this joke an' then move on to someone else's bloggie for a much better TT than I could muster this week.

Words Aren't Enough on Wednesday ...

We join the blogosphere in saying, "God speed" to Oscar the Puppycat, beloved father-figure to many.

Meme on Monday: Scattergories

I was cruisin' 'round the blogosphere checkin' in on my best friends' bloggies when I came across this cool meme at Skeezix's Scratching Post. He says that he got it from his "special friend" Daisy the Curly Cat.

RULES: Use the 1st letter of your name to answer each of the following...they have to be real places, names, things...nothing made-up!

Try to use different answers if the person in front of you had the same 1st initial. You CAN'T use your name for the boy/girl name question.


What is your name? DaisyMae Maus
4 letter word: DAMN as in "Damn, Billy Bob! That's a ginormous monster truck you've got parked there in front of your double-wide. Are you fixin' to take it off'n those blocks an' put somathem there tires on it?"

Vehicle: Ducati (I like that kind of bike 'cuz there's a "cat" in the middle!)
TV Show: "Desperate Housewives"
City: Dubai
Boy Name: Duncan
Girl Name: Devon
Alcoholic Drink: Dirty Martini
Occupation: Delivery Boy
Something you wear: Dicky (No, you pervs ... )
Celebrity: Dolly Parton
Food: Doughnuts
Something found in a bathroom: Dippity Doo
Reason for being late: Driving while Dumb
Cartoon Character: Dr. Zoidberg from "Futurama"
Something You Shout: "D'Oh!"


What is your name? Cocoa Puff
4 letter word: CRAP!
Vehicle: Corvette
TV Show: "CSI"
City: Corpus Christi
Boy Name: Corbin
Girl Name: Celeste
Alcoholic Drink: champagne (especially Veuve Cliquot)
Occupation: Counselor
Something you wear: Crinolines ... the "puffier" the better
Celebrity: Charles Nelson Reilly
Food: Cookies!!!
Something found in a bathroom: See "4-letter word" above
Reason for being late: Cryin' in the restroom
Cartoon Character: Cat-Dog
Something You Shout: See "4-letter word" above



What is your name? Sparky Fuzzypants
4 letter word: SUCK ... As in "You SUCK for leavin' such a colossal stink pile in the litterbox!"
Vehicle: Saturn (but only the "Sky" 'cuz the others SUCK)
TV Show: "SpongeBob SquarePants"
City: Savannah
Boy Name: Sergio
Girl Name: Stephanie
Alcoholic Drink: Sex on the Beach
Occupation: Solicitor
Something you wear: Stilletos (or is it stilletoes?)
Celebrity: SHAMU!
Food: Snickers bars
Something found in a bathroom: Hee, hee, hee ... Uh. Soap.
Reason for being late: Stinkin' up the litterbox
Cartoon Character: Sandy Cheeks from "SpongeBob SquarePants"
Something You Shout: "Shazaam!"


What is your name? Pumpkin
4 letter word: PRAT
Vehicle: Porsche
TV Show: Are there any shows that start with "P"? Hmmm ... Oh, right. "The Pink Panther"
City: Portland
Boy Name: Preston
Girl Name: Penny
Alcoholic Drink: Pink Squirrel
Occupation: Postal Carrier
Something you wear: Pajamas
Celebrity: Paulie Shore
Food: Pepperoni Pizza with (jalapeño) Peppers
Something found in a bathroom: The Potty
Reason for being late: Pregnant ... Oh, not THAT kind of "late"
Cartoon Character: Penelope Pitstop from the "Wacky Racers"
Something You Shout: "PLEEEEEEEEAAAASSSEEEE!"

What is your name? Lucky Charmz
4 letter word: LOVE ... Like, "I LOVE Temptations®!"

Vehicle: Lambra ... Lambro ... Lambru ... Lincoln Continental
TV Show: "Leave it to Beaver"
City: Louisville, Kentucky
Boy Name: Leslie
Girl Name: Lulu
Alcoholic Drink: Louwenbrau ... "Here's to good friends. Tonight is somethin' special ..."
Occupation: Litigator ... Isn't that like a really small crocodile?
Something you wear: Longjohns
Celebrity: Lucy Liu
Food: Liver-flavored Temptations®
Something found in a bathroom: Lip gloss
Reason for being late: Um ... Leg cramp
Cartoon Character: Lyle Lovett ... Whaddya mean he's not a cartoon character?!?
Something You Shout: "Leapin' Lizards!"

Daisy says, "I'm not feelin' like taggin' anyone, so I'll say: 'Hey, Efurryone! This is a fun meme an' you should play ... right ... NOW!'"

English Language Development in Cats and others

Being a cat, English is my second language (I'm a native speaker of "Meow"). Since Mom's a teacher, I have access to a grammarian who most assuredly speaks as precisely as she writes.

Mom attempts to fine-tune the diction of her students in order to help them to sound as bright as they are, but on occasion, even she is hard-pressed to explain the "whys" of the English language to her ninth graders. Today, she tried to explain why the words "laughter" and "slaughter" ... while spelled virtually the same (save for an "s") ... are pronounced wildly differently.

She resorted to telling them that English is a difficult language with arbitrary rules: Deal with it.

An' just a little thought from me: Why is it that unhappy postal workers are "disgruntled," but the happy ones can't be "gruntled"?


DMM


Asylum for the Verbally Insane
Author unknown

We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,
But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes.

One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.

You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,
Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.

If the plural of man is always called men,
Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?

If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?

If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?

Then one may be that, and three would be those,
Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.

We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say methren.

Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!



And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?

Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend?

If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

Sometimes I think all the folks who grew up speaking English should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out, and in which an alarm goes off by going on.

In what other language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?

We ship by truck but send cargo by ship.

We have noses that run and feet that smell.

We park in a driveway and drive in a parkway.

And how can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

So if Father is Pop, how come Mother isn't Mop?

Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England.

We take English for granted, but if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

Concentrate!

Efurryone in the blogosphere needs to concentrate furry hard (an' say extra purrayers) to bring Anastasia home to the Cat Realm for Karl (an' her fambly, too)!

The cat blogosphere is super-strong an' efurryone knows 'bout the power of positive karmic thoughts ... So let's channel all of our efforts!

Saturday Photo Hunt #34: HAPPY

HAPPY!

The Saturday Photo Scavenger Hunt theme for this week is HAPPY ...

Mom told me that this theme would be furry difficult an' she was so very correct! Neither the Feline Americans nor I look furry happy in our photos. Most of the time we look dispeptic or constipated.

But I'm determined to meet the challenge of the Saturday Photo Scavenger Hunt each an' efurry week with somethin' ... It may not be the best photo or the most accurate interpretation of the theme, but it is somethin' ... An' I found a photo for "happy" ... I did have to stoop to a woofie photo, though ... Yep. Cousin Shadow Saluki is the featured fambly member for this week's theme.

Here he is bein' "happy" ... Enjoy! I know that HE did.

Friday's Feast #34

Appetizer
Say there’s a book written about your life. Who would you want to narrate the audio version?

Hmmm ... That's a good one. I believe that I'd want Harry Anderson of "Night Court" fame to narrate if the voice were to be male. The female voice I'd want would be Kathleen Turner.

Soup
Take the letters from your favorite kind of nut and write a sentence. (Example: Perhaps every avenue needs understanding today.)

Carefully address several handwritten envelopes weekly.


Salad
If you could go back in time and spend one week in another decade, which decade would you choose?
I would go back to the week of December 18, 1984, and convince my friends to take another route home.

Main Course
Name a song that brings back memories for you.

Ah, interesting ... "I Want To Know What Love Is" by Foreigner takes me back to my senior year of high school. A close second is "Careless Whisper" by Wham!/George Michael (or maybe "Open Arms" by Journey that drags me back to ninth grade dances back in 1981/82) ... Good times!

Dessert
Do you prefer to wash your hands in cold water or warm water?
It depends on how dirty/germ-y I am. Cold water can be very refreshing, but nothing beats some warm water and lots of soap for anihilating those nasty germs.

Aaarrrrrgh! We're REAL Monsters!

Mwwaaahhhh hhaaaa haaaaaaaaa!

I noticed this really cool activity at Sammy and Miles' bloggie, so of course, I had to try it for myself (an' the Feline Americans, as ALWAYS, had to copy me) ...

Pumpkin

Your Monster Profile

Basilisk Warrior You Feast On: Lasagna You Lurk Around In: Closets You Especially Like to Torment: Groupies

What's Your Monster Name?

Cocoa Puff

Your Monster Profile

Undead Professor You Feast On: Olives You Lurk Around In: Movie Theaters You Especially Like to Torment: Groupies

What's Your Monster Name?

Sparky Fuzzypants

Your Monster Profile

Death Terror You Feast On: Hot Dogs You Lurk Around In: Wal-mart You Especially Like to Torment: Groupies

What's Your Monster Name?

Lucky Charmz

Your Monster Profile

Cursed Midget You Feast On: Snow Cones You Lurk Around In: Swamps You Especially Like to Torment: Hipsters

What's Your Monster Name?

DaisyMae Maus

Your Monster Profile

Undead Beast You Feast On: Pickles You Lurk Around In: Flocks of Freshmen You Especially Like to Torment: Blondes

What's Your Monster Name?

Thursday Thirteen #34: Little known facts 'bout 'beans!

We know lots of stuff 'bout bein' kitties, 'cuz ... well, duh! But what do we really know 'bout the 'beans who share our lives and homes?

They're big?

They eat a whole lot?

Their litter boxes sometimes smell a whole lot worse than ours?

Well, there's much, much more that we need to know!!!

In order to inform an' amuse, I present a Thursday Thirteen 'bout the bodies of 'beans!


Take some notes, cats an' kittens!
The human body is a machine that is full of wonder. This collection of human body facts will leave you wondering why in the heck they were designed the way they were.

1. Scientists say the higher a 'bean's I.Q., the more a 'bean dreams.

2. The largest cell in the human body is the female egg and the smallest is the male sperm.

3. 'Beans use 200 muscles to take a single step.

4. The average woman 'bean is 5 inches shorter than the average man (an' Mom is three inches taller than the average man).

5. 'Bean's big toes have two bones each while the rest have three, an' a pair of human feet contain 250,000 sweat glands. There is about one trillion bacteria on each of 'bean foot. (No WONDER they smell so awful! It's a good thing that 'beans only have TWO feet instead of four!).

6. A full bladder is roughly the size of a soft ball ('cept when 'beans get "elderly" ... that's when their bladders seem to mysteriously shrink an' they're using the human litter box a squillion times a day).

7. The acid in a 'bean's stomach is strong enough to dissolve razor blades. Who's stupid enough to eat a razor blade anyway?

8. The human brain cell can hold 5 times as much information as the Encyclopedia Britannica.

9. It takes the food seven seconds to get from a 'bean's mouth to the stomach.

10. The average human dream lasts 2-3 seconds ... an' is in black-and-white (like ME! ... Go Tuxies!).

11. Men without hair on their chests are more likely to get cirrhosis of the liver than men with hair. Yet another argument against waxing???

12. At the moment of conception, 'beans spend about half an hour as a single cell.

13. An' a 'bean's thumb is the same length as his/her nose.


Okay, 'beans ... Fess up! At this very moment I know full well you are putting this last fact to the test...now remove your thumb from your nose and pass this on to the friends you think might be interested in comparing their thumbs to their noses as well ......

Charmee gave Mom the bitey ...

Yesterday, Cousin Shadow Saluki stopped by with his dad (our Uncle James). Uncle James had furry wonderful news that he had passed his CSET in English Language & Literature and could now do his student teaching. While Shadow was at our house, he left a flea.

That flea jumped on Charmee's white wanna-meezer fur ... an' Mom saw it.

Mom got the pink flea comb and combed that flea right off of Charmee, but she wasn't very delicate 'bout it an' she made Charmee mad.

Then ... things got worse. Mom got out the ampules of Feline Advantage an' started dosing us.

Charmee got his first 'cuz he was the easiest to catch.

Then Sparky Fuzzypants, Cocoa Puff ... an' me.

Mom grabbed Pumpkin out from under the bed an' squirted his ampule onto the nape of his neck.

It seemed as if all was well ... even though we smelled like "chemicals."

But no ... She had to make with the clippy claws, too.

That was too much for Charmee.

He hissed.

He puffed up his K-Mart tail.

He took a swing at Cocoa Puff and launched himself at ME!

Mom doesn't like it when Charmee is a meanie, so she grabbed him an' picked him up.

Charmee was REALLY mad by then, so ...

HE ... PUT ... THE ... BITEY ... ON ... MOM'S ... RIGHT ... HAND!!!!

An' he drew blood.

Bad boy, Charmee. You're not supposed to draw blood, 'specially from Mom.

Mom was so stunned that she bopped him on the buns an' then hurried to clean her wound.

(Shaking her head from side to side): Charmee is a bad boy.

DMM

HOLIDAY GiZZY QUILTS: Don't miss out!

If you wanna buy one of the special edition Holiday Gizzy Quilts that Millie's momma made then you'll need to be ready on September 2nd when the Holiday Gizzys go on-sale!

Remember: The big ON-SALE date for Holiday Gizzys made by Millie an' Jasmine's momma is SUNDAY, September 2nd, 2007. The time is NOON in New Hampster time ... I'm gonna make sure that my mom is up extra early so that we can be sure to get one!

Triplets ...

... Or further proof that Mom likes Tuxies the best!

I was visitin' my Cousin Zoey's bloggie where she has a post showin' how much we look alike (an' Boo, too).

That got me to thinkin' 'bout how I'm Mom's fourth Tuxie an' the third with the special white chin. I figured that since were were finding our "twins" on the internet, I'd just post my "triplets" from Mom's photo archive. What could be easier?

Mom's first Tuxie-with-a-white-chin was Lacey Bunns. Bunny was born on July 4th in 1988. Her momma, MeeMaw, was a Tuxie, too (but not one with the special white chin). Lacey Bunns had long, angora-like fur, white knuckles, an' white boots.

Bunny went to the 'Bridge on December 10, 1995, an' Mom was furry sad.

While Lacey Bunns was still livin', Mom rescued a little Tuxie boy that she named Toby. This was in August of 1989. Tobinky liked water an' snoopervisin' stuff. He didn't like it when Mom was outside an' he was trapped inside. He'd rub his face against the window screens and cry at Mom so that she'd rub the screen. He'd kiss her fingers through the screen.

As you can see from the photo, Toby barely has any white on his front knuckles, an' he has little white shoes. He loved to have his cottony white "bikini" tickled. Mom used to call him her "Baby Boy" 'cuz she raised him from barely a month old. When he went to the Bridge on November 21, 1996, Mom had to stay home from work 'cuz she couldn't stop cryin'.

An' then she met ME! I am her best cat ('specially 'cuz I'm a Tuxie). She calls me "Beautiful Girl" an' "Honey Maus". I've been livin' with Mom since December 31, 1996. I was a full-grown adult when she 'dopted me (along with my brother, Huckleberry Finn ... who was a cow-cat).

I have the requisite white chin, white mitts, and a pair of white thigh-highs. In fact, of all Mom's Tuxies, I'm the one with the most white fur ...

So, there we are ... Triplets across time. I've got a sister an' a brother from other mothers (but I do think that we have a daddy in common).

DMM

The Black Masheen's a "spicy vixen," too?!?

You can't see it furry well from the photo, but Mom got a pink glitter sticker made to alert efurryone to when I'm ridin' in my PTU ... It says "spicy vixen," 'cuz I'm a SPICY VIXEN!

UPDATE: Those of you who are extra spicy an' wanna advertise your "spicy vixen-ocity" on your bean's masheen should travel to your local mall and check to see if you've got a kiosk guy who makes customized stickers.

The sticker that Mom had made took about ten minutes to create. The guy was furry quick. She got to choose the sticker material herself an' it only cost $14.95 plus local sales tax.

Lucy-Furr's Squillion!

This is the baby Squillion that Mom painted for our new cousin, Lucy-Furr. She's in a box surrounded by bubble wrap awaitin' a trip to the post office. Benjamin-Fuzz an' Lucy-Furr should meet the new Squillion by Friday! Whoo hoo!
DMM

Saturday Photo Hunt #33: TWO

TWO!

The Saturday Photo Scavenger Hunt theme for this week is TWO ...

I was thinkin' 'bout all of the stuff that we have TWO of ... an' I couldn't decide which photos to post, so I'm gonna post three TWO examples for this week's photo hunt.

1. We have TWO Gizzy Quilts that Millie's momma made. Charmee is showin' 'em off.
The one on the right is our original Bizzy for Gizzy "Flying Quilt" ... It's in our favorite colors: Green and Purple.

On the left is our Patriotic Gizzy that we got around the Fourth of July.

We LOVE our Gizzys ... They both get tons of use. We can't wait 'til September 2nd when the Holiday Gizzys go on-sale!

2. Our second example of TWO is our pair of fuzzy wands. The pink one came from Zoey and the Furrballs (and Cha-Ching's) momma and daddy. It's made by Barbie an' we love to play with it. Charmee gets a little too exuberant with it, so Mom has to keep it safe between playtimes. She puts it in the china cabinet or the 'frigerator, 'cuz Charmee can't get into those places. Mom bought the yellow one as a just-in-case ...



3. Our third example of TWO is a pair of Laurel Burch figurines that Mom was given by a dear friend who went to the Bridge a little more than four years ago. Ms. Corolla was Mom's colleague next door ... Every year they gave each other "cat" gifts 'cuz both of them liked cats. These statues are just two of the gorgeous "cats" in Mom's collection.

Friday's Feast #33

Appetizer
Describe your laundry routine. Do you have a certain day when you do it all, or do you just wash whatever you need for the next day?

Laundry usually gets done on the weekends because there just isn't enough "after work" time to do more than one or two loads. An overflowing laundry basket is USUALLY the biggest hint that laundry needs doing.

Soup
In your opinion, what age will you be when you’ll consider yourself to truly be old?

I was talking to a colleague about the changing parameters of "old" over our lifetimes. When I was a pre-teen, "old" was sixty-five. I could tell that a person was about sixty-five because s/he had white hair, hearing aids, and either a cane or a walker.

As I have gotten older, the qualifications for being "old" have broadened a lot and the age range has moved toward the eighties and nineties rather than "retirement age" ...

I sometimes FEEL really old, mostly because I work with high-schoolers who consider twenty-five to be old and marvel that I'll turn forty this year ...

If I had to put an age bracket around "old," I suppose that I'll be "old" at eighty. Ask me again in forty years and I may have a totally different answer for you!


Salad
What is one of your goals? Is it short-term, long-term, or both?
My long-term goal is to be fully retired before I turn sixty. I want to have enough money in my mutual fund, the STRS (state teacher retirement system), and my annuity (457 and 403b) to be able to support myself, my aunt (if she needs me), and my brother and his wife (if they need me). I don't have kids and I've never married, so my money is my own entirely.

I want to create a scholarship fund at my school for deserving students whose families make just-a-little-too-much to qualify for Cal-Grants (that was ME).

I'd like to continue to support causes that mean something to me both financially and through volunteerism.

And I'd like to see all of the United States (either by visiting them ... OR from space!).

Main Course
Name something unbelievable you’ve seen or read lately.
When I was a student-teacher, I had a senior girl named Ruby who gave birth to her first child just before Christmas in 1990. Her son starts his senior year of high school this year. To me ... That's UNBELIEVABLE!

Dessert
On a scale of 1-10 with 10 being highest, how happy are you today?
I'm less "happy" than I am "satisfied" ... My progress report grades are turned in and MOST of my kids are doing well. I have a full tank of gasoline and some money in my pocket. The gear for my trip has been arriving as planned. There are four weeks left in the quarter. I met with the pet sitter yesterday and she seems terrific.

Life's pretty good right now ...

Thursday Thirteen #33: Things that you don't hear these days!

Here are some things that you don’t hear anymore (gosh, they sure do show Mom’s age!!)

1. Be sure and refill the ice trays, we are going to have company after awhile.

2. Watch for the postman, I want to get this letter to Aunt Mary in the mail today.

3. Don't forget to wind the clock before you go to bed.

4. When you ride your bicycle, don't forget to signal each turn. Left arm straight out for a left turn, left arm bent up at the elbow for a right turn, and straight down when you slow or stop.

5. You have torn the knees out of that pair of pants so many times there is nothing left to put a patch on.

6. Don't you go out side with your good school clothes on!

7. Quit jumping on the floor! I have a cake in the oven and you are going to make it fall if you don't quit!

8. There’s five dollars in my purse, go by and get five gallons of gas when you start to town.

9. Don't sit to close to the TV. It is hard on your eyes. And turn on a light!

10. Eat those vegetables, they will make you big and strong like your daddy.

11. Hush your mouth! I don't want to hear words like that, I will wash your mouth out with soap!

12. If you get a spanking in school and I find out about it, you will get another one when you get home.

13. Quit crossing your eyes! They will get stuck that way!


Well, that ought to keep all you ‘beans remembering some of the finer things of the past, some good and some not so good ...

Celebrate National Cat Day!

I took a look at Mom's calendar today and was furry surprised to find that today, August 15, 2007, is CAT Day! Or so it says on the calendar ...

Labor Day ... Administrative Professionals' Day ... Groundhog Day ... What's wrong with this picture, folks?!?

According to Tiger Hample ... found at Happy Cat Day ... August 15th is the proposed day of a holiday to recognize the value of felines worldwide. Tiger urges efurry cat to write to senators an' newspaper editors, stage meow-ins at government offices an' in state capitals, and otherwise make a litterbox-sized stink about our overlooked selves ... Cats of the blogosphere must UNITE!




An' to my friends in the blogosphere, I bid you a furry ...

Happy CAT Day!

Wanna come campin' wif me?

Charmee said to tell all of you that he'd love to have you teleport over for campin' an' a cook-out!

He plans to serve cans of Fancy Feast Elegant Medleys Chicken an' egg souffle that he's gonna grill over open flames(!) ...

He has a couple of possible campin' sites: Near the fish tank, in the wilds of the computer room, an' atop the fireplace hearth where things are "cool an' rocky" ...

Bring your tents an' bedrolls if you've got 'em ...

If you don't, we have about five tents available (TENT WAAAAAARRRRRRSSSS) plus there's extra room in Charmee's "Campmor" box (it held the portable human litterbox that Mom's takin' when she goes campin' in September) ...

I promise to tell super-spooky ghostie stories while we roast Temptations in the fireplace! Mwwaahhh hhaaaa hhhaaaaaa!

DMM

Wordless Wednesday: I wanna go campin', too!

Tuxie an' Tabby Toozday: Fuzzypants an' me

The Middle Name Meme

My cousin, Benjamin Fuzz, started his furry own meme and tagged me to play, too! Here it is ...


The Middle Name Meme

This is the exact wording from Ben's bloggie ...

"I found this meme recently while I was surfing. It looks pretty fun...so I'll start it here.

First the rules:
1. Post the rules before you give the facts.
2. List one fact that is somehow relevant to you and your life for each letter of your middle name. If you don’t have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.
3. When you are tagged you need to write your post using your middle name and facts about it.
4. At the end of your post, choose one cat to tag for each letter of your middle name. Be sure to let each cat know she/he has been tagged. (It's ok if you don't do this...tag who you want to tag!)

My middle name is "Maus" ... an' like lots of beans, I prefer to be called by my middle name (or my nickname ... you choose).

M = magnetic, magnificent, mercurial, and messy (I make a huge mess with my stinky goodness)

A = awesome, angelic, aggressive, and altruistic

U = unique and under-tall (I'm a shortie!)

S = spunky, sassy, sweet, and silky


Anyone who'd like to play is welcome to do so ... Just remember to attach the rules to the beginning of your post!

Nose Twins: Feline American Cocoa Puff!

Cocoa Puff is meetin' George's "nose twin" challenge. You can find out more about the challenge by visitin' George (an' Tipper an' Max an' Misty, too) at Crew's Views.

Saturday Photo Hunt #32: ROW

ROW!

The Saturday Photo Scavenger Hunt theme for this week is ROW ...

Mom has a Sea Eagle kayak livin' in the shed outside (yep, THAT shed). Her kayak came with two sturdy paddles that she uses to move it around. Mom says that those paddles are used to ROW ... So those paddles are our submission for this week's theme!

Friday's Feast #32

Appetizer
What is your favorite kind of pie?
BLUEBERRY. Hands down.

My Aunt Doris (who died last August/September) made the most excellent blueberry pie from berries that she picked herself. She and my Uncle Ted owned property near Astoria in a place called Clatskanie, and that area is lousy with blueberries. Juicy, slightly sweet, and unforgettable!

Soup
Name something that made you smile this week.
My students are very low-skilled ... Their malapropisms and mis-pronounced story reading can be hilarious. A child was reading today and came across the slang "c'mon" ... He pronounced it "see-moan" ... Too funny.

Salad
What do you do to cool off when the weather is hot and humid?
Cold showers are nice as a temporaray fix. I like to shut the windows, turn out the lights, and crank up the central refrigeration until it's sub-Arctic inside!

Main Course
You receive $1,000 in the mail with a letter that says you can only use the money to redecorate one room in your home. Which room do you pick, and what do you buy to spruce it up?
That's an easy one! I'd rip out the living room and dining room carpet and replace it with a Bella Wood floor. The dark green carpet is excellent quality, but it's seen better days and smells really funky along the perimeter because of certain Feline Americans' pee problems ...

Dessert
Fill in the blank: My _________ says __________, but I __________.

My t-shirt says, "I'm with Stupid!", but I dumped him years ago.

Thursday Thirteen #32: Cats an' baths

Mom's colleague the calculus teacher sent Mom an email full of photos of cats not enjoyin' their baths.

I thought that they were funny 'cuz they made me appreciate Feline Advantage flea control an' the fact that I'm an indoor-only cat ...

Cat Baths!
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An' while we're on a "bath theme," here are two photos of Feline American Toby before he got his bath. He was fascinated with water an' liked to sneak into the bathroom when Mom was runnin' bath water. More than once, he slipped on the tub rim an' got dunked in the Mr. Bubble ... Hee, hee!

12.

13.

Tagged for a MEME! Five Things That Changed Your Life

Ariel tagged Marilyn MonReow, an' Marilyn Monreow tagged me ...

Five Things that Changed Your Life

1. Meeting Mom when my former owner ... a twelve year old boy named "John" who lived with seven HORRIBLE siblings in a house up the street ... brought my brother an' me for a visit. We were outdoor cats, but we longed to be indoor cats with Mom.

We spent twenty-four hours a day hanging around Mom's house 'cuz we didn't wanna be with the horrible kids (Especially the little one ... He was the worst!) Don't tell ... but Mom got us spayed/neutered while we still belonged to that fambly.

2. Getting abandoned (along with my brother, Huckleberry Finn) when "John" an' his fambly moved to Oregon under cover of darkness about ten years ago.

3. Moving in with Mom on New Year's Eve in 1996. We got our first baths ... which we tolerated 'cuz we were just sick to death of fleas!

4. Getting my own blog! I had been readin' Skeezix's bloggie (an' Kukka-Maria's, too) ... Through bloggin', I got to meet so many wonderful cats ... an' got my momma's brother (Hi, Uncle James!), auntie, and cousin involved in bloggin', too.

5. Meetin' my handsome tom-friend, Jake. Meeeeoowww! (An' bein' a member of Rocky the Gutter Cat's "Spicy Vixens").


And I'll tag any cat (or woofie or bun or anyone else) who'd like to play, too!

Monty Q's BabyBean could use your purrayers!

Monty Q's BabyBean got hurt on Saturday. She's in the hospital with burns on her face, arms, and chest. Monty Q. an' his fambly could use lots of purrs and purrayers from all of us in the blogosphere.

Please send your positive energy to the BabyBean ...
DMM

Saturday Photo Hunt #31: FUNKY

FUNKY!

The Saturday Photo Scavenger Hunt theme for this week is FUNKY ...

If Mom hadn't been so busy this week, she would have taken a photo of our Aunt Annie's car for this week's Photo Hunt. Our Aunt Annie has decorated her little blue Hyundai with all kinds of tacky plastic statues and colorful rubber snakes. Her car always reminds Mom of our great-grandma (Ben and Lucy-Furr's momma's momma) who used to do the same kind of thing with hers.

But Mom was busy with Open House an' other school-related stuff, so she didn't take the picture. Sigh ...

So ... for this week's theme ... we're postin' a photo of Charmee in yet another of his FUNKY get-ups. This is Charmee as a helicopter. Furry funky if I do say so myself.

Friday's Feast #31: Leftovers from 4/2006

*This feast contains leftovers from April 2006. Consume at your own risk!*

Appetizer
On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being highest, how polite are you?
Gosh ... That's a tough one because I was raised to be polite to everyone regardless of how brainless, useless, or undeserving the person might be. So ... if I were just to rate myself based on outward behavior, I'd have to say about an eight.

Soup
What was the last thing that made you laugh out loud?
"The Simpsons Movie." I saw it last Wednesday and nearly shot soda out of my nose during Bart's nude skateboarding scene.

If you've seen the movie, you know exactly what I mean ...

Salad
Who is your favorite cartoon character?
"SpongeBob Squarepants." Everyone who knows me knows about SpongeBob. My cellphone ringtone is the very beginning of his theme ... "Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Sponge! Bob! Square! Pants! ..."

Main Course
Tell about the funniest teacher you ever had.
Ah. That would have to have been Mr. Jay Maness (may he rest in peace) for science in eighth grade and chemistry during my senior year. He was unintentionally funny, but brilliant just the same.

He wore ties that were so wide that they looked like bibs for a lobster restaurant. He also wore some very odd sandals (with black socks) ... I later recognized them as being early versions of Birkenstocks.

He did experiments involving distilled water and a car battery that nearly got him electrocuted, and tried to illustrate displacement by making a rope swing, hanging it from the classroom ceiling, and then trying to swing in it (nearly ripping down a whole bank of lights).

When I student-taught at another local high school, I had the privilege of being his daughter's senior English teacher. Can you imagine THAT Open House? Yep. It was like old folks' day at the home ... Quite a reunion.

Dessert
Complete this sentence: I strongly believe that ______________________.

I strongly believe that pets should be neutered (unless owned and managed by licensed breeders) AND that pets should be supervised at all times.

Fashion Show Friday featurin' Formal Wear Charmee!

Thursday Thirteen #31: Open House AGAIN???

Tonight is Open House at Mom's school ... AGAIN!!! Already!!!

As you're aware, Mom hates Open House an' I really hate that she often works a fifteen hour day that day.

In honor of Mom's day of torture, I'm presentin' ...

Thirteen Things That I'd Say To Parents At Open House If Cats Could Teach High School

1. Convert the basement because you're gonna be supportin' your child for the next fifty or so years of YOUR life.
2. School ... for your child ... ends at 4 PM because he's going to be servin' detention for this entire year.
3. I hope that you bought stock in Pink Pearl 'cuz your kid makes tons of mistakes.
4. Did you drop her on her head?
5. I have two words for you: Social Promotion.
6. I've hacked up more intelligent hairballs.
7. Teens should be spayed or neutered!
8. Sparky Fuzzypants is brighter than your kid an' he's got a room-temperature IQ!
9. Did you drop her on her head?
10. Now that I've met you, I understand why your son says and does such stupid stuff in my class.
11. Your daughter has the morals of an alley cat (!) an' dresses like a tramp!
12. Aarrrrrghhhhh!
13. And ... Did you drop her on her head?