Life is my litterbox ... Grab the SCOOP!

Thursday, May 31, 2007

Ugh! So you've had a bad day ...

Mom just got home and she looks whipped.

"Meow!" (Welcome back, Mom!)
"Meow!" (Come and sit by me! I'll tell you about my day!)
"Meow!" (I could use a pet or two!)
"Meeooowwww!" (If you won't talk to me, would you at least give me some Temptations®?)

She just sighed ("Hrrrmmmpph ...") before stalking into the bedroom to put down her sweater and school bag.

She didn't say ANYTHING to me when she went to check the messages on the speakin' box.

No messages. Good. Maybe NOW she has some time to chat with me on the couch.

"Meow, meow, meow ... ick?" (What's the matter, Mom? Woofie get your tongue?)

"Meow, wow??" (C'mon ... You can tell me.)

And here's what she said:

"Maus, today pretty well sucked. I'm glad that it's over. My ninth graders have lost their minds. My school is going to hell in a handbasket."

"Meow?" (And why do you think this?)

"Well, let me break it down for you:

The principal's secretary, two weeks before she officially retires, tripped in the main office and broke her hip this morning.

The father of one of my ninth graders was badly injured at his job when heated plastic blew up in his face giving him massive burns. Life-Flight had to take him to the hospital this morning.

Two of my ninth grade boys violated their probation and are now supposedly in juvie. Neither is a member of the "brain trust," so will likely continue on this path until they do something that gets them killed. This is an on-going problem.

One of my ninth grade girls was caught having sex (during the time she was supposed to be in MY CLASS) in the park across the street. The police issued her a citation and she'll have to appear in court. Heaven help us all if she is pregnant.

When a teacher confiscated his cell phone during second period today, another of my little charmers threatened to "punch the teacher in the face." This is the same child who drives around my neighborhood with other kids in the car. He's too young to have a learners' permit. He's unlicensed and uninsured ... And his parents are okay with this as he picks up his mom from work.

Still another of my sterling citizens was caught drinking in the boys' restroom. He had brought a ninth grade girl with him. He popped a .24 BA level and she was more than .40 BA level. She had to be rushed to the hospital for alcohol poisoning. He's been suspended for five days and will likely return to school tomorrow having learned NOTHING from this experience.

Oh, and I gave a practice CAHSEE (California High School Exit Exam) to my seniors in first period. The highest grade was 50%. They have to PASS this test in order to graduate. Graduation is two weeks from today."

Wow. No wonder you look so defeated, Mom. Your day DID suck. I won't bring up the hairball that Sparky Fuzzypants gacked up under your wicker chair. Or the fact that Cocoa Puff peed on the carpet again. Or that Charmee ate a piece of licorice ('cept that I've got PHOTOS of that!) ...

"Meow, meow." (C'mere Mom. Sit by me and give me a pet.)

"Meow-oww." (Tomorrow will be better.)

"Maus: From your lips to God's ears ...".

"Meeooowwww!" (Would you give me some Temptations® now?)

Thursday Thirteen #22: Mom's embarrassin' nicknames

As promised, here are our THIRTEEN NICKNAMES for Mom.

1. “Paycheck” ... That’s her main function in the Feline American universe.
2. “Heating Element” ... When the paw pads are feelin’ chilly, Mom’s usually nice and warm. She makes a satisfying squealing noise when cold nose meets warm body.
3. “Thumbs” ... She’s got ‘em; we don’t.
4. “Pooper Scoop” ... If the litter boxes are a tad funky (and no, I don’t mean “funk-kay”), it’s her job.
5. “Captain Work” ... In the morning, Captain Work leaves and Paycheck returns in the afternoon. It’s along the same lines as Clark Kent and phone booths.
6. “Princess Shins” ... Multi-functional: Good for rubbin’ against when we want something AND a handy scratchin’ post.
7. “Toy Box” ... She buys ‘em, makes ‘em, and cleans ‘em up when we’re tired of ‘em.
8. “Bubbles” ... Charmee actually thinks that this IS her name.
9. “Tone Deaf” ... She sings the “Bing-Bing” song to us in a voice that could peel paint from walls ... on the Space Shuttle!
10. “Morning Breath” ... Hers rivals the stinkiest of “stinky goodness” ... Eeewwww.
11. “Hair Ball” ... If you think that gack looks yucky, check out Mom’s hair in the morning.
12. “Cuddle Monster” ... She’s an expert at the drive-by grab! Ooo ... and squeeze, too!
13. “Sealy Posturepedic” ... The way we lay on Mom (asleep or awake), she might as well be a mattress.

Monday, May 28, 2007

Memorial Day 2007

Today isn't just a "day off" or the "unofficial start of summer" ... or a shopping day full of "super sales" ...

Let us honor the "Memorial" in Memorial Day. Make it a day where we actively remember our ancestors, our family members, our loved ones, our neighbors, and our friends who have given the ultimate sacrifice.

These are some things that you can do:

• visit cemeteries and place flags or flowers on the graves of our fallen heroes.

• visit memorials.

• fly the U.S. Flag at half-staff until noon.

•fly the 'POW/MIA Flag' as well (Section 1082 of the 1998 Defense Authorization Act).

•participate in a "National Moment of Remembrance": at 3 p.m. to pause and think upon the true meaning of the day, and for Taps to be played.

• renew a pledge to aid the widows, widowers, and orphans of our falled dead, and to aid the disabled veterans.

This is a pair of photos of the veterans in our lives. On the left is our Uncle Frank (he's the grandad of Zoey, Chewbacca, Gandalf the Gray, and Smoke. On the right is our grandad. Both of them were furry young when these photos were taken prior to the beginning of the war in Viet Nam. Thankfully, both are still living.

In Flanders Fields
John McCrae, 1915.
In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.
We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

Sunday, May 27, 2007

Marilyn Monroew's TRUE CONFESHUNS

The ladies at Big Piney Woods (Patches, Mittens, Precious, and Mistrie) tagged us for another meme called True Confeshuns that was started by Marilyn Monroew ...

Here are our deepest and most sordid secrets ... Don't tell anyone, okay?
DaisyMae Maus
1. I like to gently put the bitey on Mom's hand when she rubs my belly 'cuz she tastes good.
2. I'm a junk-food junkie with a serious hamburger addiction.
3. I have a sweet tooth for Hostess Fruit Pies.

Cocoa Puff:
1. I HAVE TO choose the flavor of stinky goodness each dinnertime; no one else can! I race to the cabinet and force my way in so I get to choose.
2. I'm slightly too hefty to fit totally inside the litter box, so sometimes I poop on the litter mat instead.
3. I have a difficult time cleaning my own buns 'cuz I roll around like a Weeble® when I try to get my leg up in the air.

Sparky Fuzzypants:
1. Even though I'm a boy, Fudge Ripple used to think that I was a girl and bite me on the neck.
2. I talk to bugs and birdies that fly/crawl outside the window. I speak fluent hummingbird.
3. I really, really wanna be a supermodel when I grow up.

1. I have to eat my stinky goodness in private ... in the bedroom.
2. I don't like the food that humans eat. I only want catfood and cat treats. Sometimes I swallow Temptations® whole.
3. I've stolen efurry single one of Mom's hair scrunchees and hidden them under the bed. It's a good thing that she got her hair cut or I'd be in BIG trouble.

Lucky Charmz:
1. Mom had to teach me how to be a cat when I was a tiny boy. (She looked RIDICULOUS, but she's good at bein' a cat).
2. I like to peep under the bathroom door while Mom's in there. When she's brushin' her teeth, I like to grab at her feet!
3. I have a piggy bank for all of my allowance money. Mom says that the money's for my tuition at Princeton. I secretly uses it to sponsor cats at Best Friends and/or buy Temptations®.

We tag:
Ernest and Fritz of 'Fritzamus Maximus'
Edsel of 'Edsel/The Pooch'
and Casper plus anybody else who would like to participate, too!

Sundays are for sharin' ...

Here are some pictures of Skeeter and LC enjoyin' the presents that we sent to them for The Big Thing's birthday. We sent some cans of stinky goodness that we like (Natural Balance and ProPlan Selects), some treats from Greenies and Pounce, some bouncy ping-pong balls to skitter around on those gorgeous hardwood floors (We LOVE the ones that Puff and Spot sent to us, so we got Mom to buy some of the same kind! Clever, huh?), and two SQUILLIONS that just happen to be döppelgangers of Skeeter and LC!

The Big Thing took pictures with the flashy thing for us so that we could show Skeeter and LC to all of our furriends in the blogosphere!

Here are the treats that we sent all the way to the East Coast!

This is LC givin' all of the treats a big sniff and introducin' herself to the Squillions!

And here's Skeeter doin' the same ... Notice how the flashy thing made his tail look furry wild and cool!

Be sure to stop by their bloggie and pay 'em a visit! You can find Skeeter and LC here!

Saturday, May 26, 2007

Saturday Photo Hunt #21: COLORFUL


The Saturday Photo Scavenger Hunt theme for this week is COLORFUL and I can't think of anything more colorful than rainbows.

This is a picture of part of Mom's favorite uncle's rainbow collection (Ooooo ... That just reminded me of that Kermit the Frog song from the "Muppet Movie" called "The Rainbow Connection"! I like that song a whole lot!). He's got a furry cool little house on stilts that is surrounded by tall, leafy trees ('cept some of 'em fell down during the winter when Seattle had all of those storms).

He calls his itty bitty house "The Tree House" and he has an amazing collection of colorful decorations. Mom makes it a habit to send him stuff that she finds that have the colors of the rainbow because he loves, loves, LOVES them.

Mom took this picture when she last visited. Her visit took place last August when she went up to Seattle to participate in her cousin's 90th birthday celebration.

Mom was captivated by the view out one of her uncle's huge windows. The morning sunlight was AMAZING and the green leafy trees were nothing like what we have down here in southernmost San Diego.

Oh, don't spoil the surprise ...
Mom found some neat rainbow-colored stuff to add to his collection. Mom's favorite uncle's gonna get even more colorful!


Friday, May 25, 2007

Tell a friend ...

Post-GradNite 2007: Mom is toast

Hmmm ... Murphy's Law.

The Senior Class advisor had an unavoidable emergency and couldn't make the trip.

The Dean of Women couldn't attend the bus boarding, so Mom had to frisk the female students prior to allowing them on buses.

The permission slips were scrambled and the boarding lists weren't alphabetized making check in slower.

The Principal (Napoleon complex much??) ... who's NEVER experienced GradNite before ... wouldn't let veterans do what they do without his input. BTW: Mom's done GradNite about ten times in her career. And thankfully, the male APs did the frisking of the male students quickly 'cuz the Principal didn't help.

The bus company had an "eight hours off" rule that came into play when the buses got a later start.

Bus driver kept flirting with Mom (Grandma kept rolling her eyes 'til they looked like they'd roll out of her head).

Seniors sang camp songs ("Ninety-nine Bottles of Beer," anyone?) for 110 miles; most didn't want to watch "A Night At The Museum" (GREAT movie, BTW). The singing wasn't bad; the lead soloist for the marachi program, the female half of the choir, and the singer of the National Anthem for graduation were pretty good at harmonizing. It got a little silly when they started singing "Like a Virgin" ... in both English and Spanish ... simultaneously.

Light drizzle between Oceanside and Anaheim.

Fifty-one kids on bus; fifty wristbands.

Paperwork had incorrect parking lot listed although Mom SWORE to efurryone that they ALWAYS parked in "Timon and Pumbaa" for GradNite: Mom was right, naturally.

GradNite was too loud to hear cellphone ring when set at "#7," aka. Ringtone for the Near Deaf (like Mom).

Bus drivers and one of the buses DIDN'T report back to the bus on time. Children arrived by 5:45 AM; bus drivers FINALLY showed up at 6:20 AM.

Aside from the "technical difficulties," GradNite was GREAT! Disneyland streamlined the frisking process by providing plastic bags for the kids to put their personal effects into allowing quicker visual scan and WAY QUICKER entrance to the Park. Guest Services surrendered the missing wristband to the fifty-first student with no hassle. Rather than holding the kids until 11:59 PM which is the rule, they were let in early.

Ride lines were nearly non-existant which allowed Mom and Grandma to visit eight attractions rather than the usual four or so:
A. The Matterhorn
B. Alice in Wonderland
C. It's A Small World (!): It was OPEN during GradNite and has been refurbished nicely.
D. Winnie the Pooh
E. The Haunted Mansion
F. Pirates of the Caribbean
G. Jungle Cruise
H. Enchanted Tiki Room

They would have been able to do a couple more things, but Grandma refused to ride on the "barf cups," Mickey's Toon Town was closed completely, the Dumbos got grounded early on, and Buzz Lightyear broke down toward the end of the night.

The lines at the three "mountains": Splash, Big Thunder (yes, also OPEN!), and Space were tremendously long as was Indiana Jones, so Mom and Grandma vetoed them in a hurry. They milled around for awhile and watched the fireworks at Sleeping Beauty's Castle TWICE.

Most of the shopping places were horrendously crowded or closed, but Grandma managed to purchase a furry nice baseball cap for Grandad that has characters and their "creation dates" all around it. It's a good-looking cap, but not as nice as my "mom-made" Maus-keteer hat.

Mom and Grandma had juice, chocolate milk, and Diet Cokes (Coke Zero was a sponsor) at the chaperone venue plus snacks (cheese, fruit, brownies, crackers, asparagus tips) and a buffet-style breakfast all for FREE!

Total cost for the night: Grandma spent $19.50 plus tax; Mom spent NOTHING (Downtown Disney was closed and no other stores had the cat/woofie stickers ... Mom's gonna get 'em online instead).

Best of all, NONE of our students got in trouble with Park security (or booked into Anaheim jail) and efurryone made it back to school in one piece by 8:30 AM.

Uncle James and his fiancée had a furry good time and even managed to take a nap (!) in the Disney theatre until the snoring started makin' them giggle ...

Mom feels like a geezer. Her knees hurt 'cuz of the bus ride, walking all over the Disney campus, and fitting legs with a 34" inseam into cars, boats, bobsleds. She didn't get to sleep on the bus on the way back, so she's had two naps today. I purred to her a bunch and did some of my most theraputic cuddling, but she still looks like leftovers from the dog's dinner. It's a good thing that this is a four-day weekend.

Friday's Feast #21

Name a sound you like to hear.


Closely followed by the sound of Elgar's "Pomp and Circumstance." I defy you to find an educator whose heart doesn't swell at those strains ...

What is your favorite kind of cheese?

Depends on the dining opportunity.
In the morning when I have trouble eating ANYTHING, I like TillaMoos (colby/jack).
For a snack, I mix canned processed cheese with a half cup of jalapeño juice to make a topping for nachos.
On a sandwich, Havarti cheese is mild and light.
On macaroni and cheese, my favorite "cheese" is day-glo orange and comes in a powdered form.
Lastly, my favorite salad topper cheese is the bleu cheese crumble.

Do you sleep late on Saturday mornings? Why or why not?

Oh, yeah ... Doesn't every work-week slave sleep in later on Saturday?

Main Course
When was the last time you forgot something? What was it, and how long did it take to remember it?

I don't often forget things. If something slips my mind, there are built in fail-safes such as TEENAGERS who delight in "reminding you gently" (yeah, right) that you've become a geezer and your mind is going.

I'm gonna say that "not remembering" anything for this question is the last thing that I forgot.

Fill in the blank: I notice ____________ when _____________.


Thursday, May 24, 2007

Thursday Thirteen #21: GradNite at Disneyland!

"Whaddya gonna do now?!?"
"I'm going to" ...

Bein’ a high school teacher is a really hard job, but it does come with some “perks”. Mom gets to do one of these “perks” tonight: Chaperone GradNite at Disneyland.

For those of you who’ve never been to California to experience Disneyland, it’s not known as the “Happiest Place on Earth” for nothing. GradNite is like "happy" on crack!

Kids of all ages love to visit the Magic Kingdom,so each weekend in May and June, Disneyland (and Disney’s California Adventure) have special events just for graduating seniors. Disneyland opens at 11:59 PM and stays open until 6:00 AM for rides, music, and dancing until dawn. Mom's favorite aspect of the overnighter in the Park is that there are no little kids and no strollers. Efurryone at GradNite is a high school senior or OLDER!

The kids at Mom’s school pay about $75 for a GradNite ticket and a seat on a charter bus (teachers who are smart and prepared bring videos for the kids to watch while on the bus). Mom doesn’t have to pay ANYTHING since she's volunteering outside her contracted duty hours ... She gets to go for free and bring a guest, too. This year, Mom’s taking Grandma. Uncle James, who’s a substitute teacher at Mom’s school, and his fiancée (Shadow Saluki’s mom) got asked to go, too. They’ll be chaperoning another bus ... And even better, the chaperone room has seats, recent theatrical releases, and FREE food and drinks (they even get a coupon for either dinner or breakfast)! The only things chaperones pay for are souveniers!

So, in honor of our fambly’s trip up to Anaheim, I’m dedicating this week’s Thursday Thirteen to ...

The Thirteen Rides/Attractions That My Fambly Will Enjoy At Disneyland’s GradNite

1. Pirates of the Caribbean ... For GradNite, all of the supersized boats are running ... AND Captain Jack Sparrow! Meeooww.

2. The Haunted Mansion ... Double the “Doom Buggies” for faster lines!

3. The Matterhorn ... Both sides running for “racing” action
4. Buzz Lightyear’s Astro Blasters ... Fun ride, short line, FREE souvenier photos to email home!

5. Jungle Cruise ... A nice, long ride for when the legs are tired.
6. Space Mountain ... The new sound and smoother track make for an exhilarating ride!

7. Splash Mountain ... Another fun rollercoaster-type ride with a nice SPLASH at the end.
8. The Many Adventures of Pooh ... Definitely a “kiddie” ride, but often deserted so you can ride again, and again, and again!
9. The Mad Tea Party ... AKA “barf cups” ... This ride makes Uncle James sick, but Mom loves it!
10. Dumbo the Flying Elephant ... Mom likes this one for its nostalgic value.
11. Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride and Alice in Wonderland ... Both are fun ways to spend a little time.
12. The Enchanted Tiki Room ... Fond memories of pineapple and Mom's grandma back in the early '80s ... Nostalgia again.
13. Gadget's Go Coaster ... A harmless little coaster in "Toon Town".

Now Disneyland’s managers aren’t stupid. Some rides are CLOSED during GradNite ‘cuz they’re just too hard to police.

A. It’s a Small World: It is just too tempting for kids. They jump out of the boats and wreak havoc.
B. Big Thunder Mountain: Troubles occur because that area of the Park is especially dark.
C. Indiana Jones Adventure: It always seems to be broken at GradNite time.
D. Pinocchio’s Daring Journey: Boats that move very slowly and tempt kids to run amok.

Oh, and check out my fashionable hat! Maybe I could stow away in Mom’s purse? Too bad they’re not allowed to bring backpacks. I’d fit right in! I've got my own 'Maus'-keteer hat!

Here's Charmee wearin' my hat!

And Cocoa Puff, too!

Disneyland photos are from Disneyland Resort's official website.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Meme: A few of my favorite things!

I got tagged by Mao-Mao for a meme about my favorite things ...

Let me get into the right frame of mind:

La, la, la ... "Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens ... Bright copper kettles and warm, woolen mittens ... Brown paper packages tied up with string ... These are a few of my favorite things!"

Time of Day:
Late evening when Mom has settled down and is watchin' the sparkly box. I get to cuddle and she shares her snack (cheese???) with me.
Anytime after 1:40 PM on weekdays.

Day of the week:
Saturday (if she's workin' ...)
Any day (if she's on vacation ...)

Mom likes Thursdays 'cuz "CSI" is on and it's almost the weekend, but not quite.

Season of the year:
Autumn. Days are still long and warm, but Mom's on vacation and I get some quality time.
Mom's favorite month is October.

Thanksgiving ... Turkey and/or ham. Enough said.

Beaches have sand just like my litter box. I'll say "litter box" beach.
Mom likes the beach that's about three miles away called Silver Strand State Beach.

Metallica ROCKS! I choose any song by Metallica.
Mom likes Death Cab For Cutie's "I'll Follow You" ...

Duh ... Daisies.
Mom prefers yellow roses or Night Blooming Jasmine (at Hallowe'en) or any citrus blossom (in the springtime in Yuma, AZ) for their scents; wedding flowers are Lily of the Valley.

Talk show:
I've heard of them, but I don't watch daytime sparkly box.
Mom says, "Blech -- Talk shows are a phenomenal waste of time. I'd rather watch a cooking show."

I like to watch cartoon movies, so I'll say "The SpongeBob Movie."
We all know that Mom loves "An American President."

No daytime sparkly box for me.
Me, either.

Culligan ice water from the door of the 'frigerator. I claim to like milk, but it makes me barf.
Mom -- Tropical iced tea at El Torito (passionfruit at Islands or Panda Express) ... no sweetner.

Hmmm ... I like the fruit in the center of a Danish pastry or the berry filling in a Hostess fruit pie.
Mom -- Blueberries! Blueberries! Blueberries! Followed closely by authentic Washington State blackberries picked myself!

Again, duh ... TEMPTATIONS!
Mom -- Puffy Cheetos or TillaMoos cheese snacks.

Fancy Feast Elegant Medleys in Salmon with egg soufflé or Chicken with egg soufflé; close second is anything that Mom's tryin' to eat.
Mom -- Rubio's fish tacos with guacamole and cheese.

Since I'm not allowed out of the house, the restaurant has to come to me. I like the edges of Whoppers from Burger King, roasted chicken from El Pollo Loco, and ribs/brisket from Merkl's BBQ and NY Deli.
Mom -- Casual = Red Robin; Fancier = PF Chang's China Bistro; Really Fancy = Reuben E. Lee Sternwheeler

I will be taggin':

Grr of Grr, Midnight & Cocoa
L.C. of Skeeter & L.C.
Sophie, Kismet's little sister
Mr. Chen and Ollie
Zoey of Zoey and the Furballs

Monday, May 21, 2007

Eight Random Things meme: The "Feline Americans" edition


I've Been Tagged: Eight Random Facts Meme
Meeyauw tagged me for this meme.

After doin' the Seven Random Facts Meme, I don't know that there are any random facts left that the blogosphere hasn't squeezed out of me.

Hmm ... what to do? What to do?

The Rules
Each player states 8 random facts/habits about themselves. People who are tagged write a blog post about their own 8 random things and post these rules. At the end of your post you need to tag 8 people and include their names. Don't forget to leave them a comment and tell them they're tagged. Ask them to read your blog.

Okey dokey ... Since you know ALMOST efurrything 'bout me, I'm gonna do:
Eight Random Facts About The Feline Americans

1. Pumpkin gets cat-acne on his lips.
2. Lucky Charmz likes to be chased around with a taco press.
3. Cocoa Puff has white whiskers on one side of his face and black ones on the other.
4. Sparky Fuzzypants goes absolutely crazy when Mom picks up the slicker brush and "brushes" the air near him.
5. Pumpkin's pawpads feel like (and LOOK LIKE) pencil erasers.
6. Lucky Charmz can tell time ... He knows when it's exactly 6:30 AM.
7. Cocoa Puff has a NASTY case of dandruff.
8. Sparky Fuzzypants likes Razzleberry pie from Marie Callender's.

I'm gonna tag anyone who wants to play! Batter up!

ManCat Monday: Helpin' in the Kitchen!

**Editor's Note: An authentic pizza was seriously harmed during the creation of this posting. Globs of gooey cheese were permanently affixed to the inside lid of the pizza box rendering two slices of pizza virtually inedible because of feline booty weight.

Lucky Charmz has been banned from the kitchen countertop in an effort to spare future pizzas a grizzy fate.

Reader discretion is advised.

Efurryone knows that a real ManCat knows his way around the kitchen and isn't afraid to get his paws dirty preparin' gourmet meals.

Lucky Charmz demonstrates his ManCat kitchen skills with Italian cuisine.

His specialty is pizza.

It's a common culinary fact that pizzas are supposed to be flat.

So what's the ManCat-ly chef to do when his crust looks like a fluffy focaccia and his guests are cravin' that thin hand-tossed style?

Improvise, of course!

Chef Charmee proves that dinner disasters can be averted by throwin' around the "junk in your trunk."

Save you a slice?

Sunday, May 20, 2007

Charmee LOVES 'Nip Bubbles!

Our Aunt Annie gave Mom another present for us: Catnip-scented BUBBLES!

Mom tried 'em out with us this weekend and of course, Charmee can't get enough of them.

Grandma snapped these photos of Charmee (and Sparky Fuzzypants) playin' with the 'nip bubbles.

Charmee has become OBSESSED with them to such an extent that Mom now has to spell "b-u-b-b-l-e-s" rather than say the word.

If you haven't tried 'nip bubbles, Petco carries their own "Pet Gold" version; the ones Aunt Annie bought for us come from Hartz and are in a cat-shaped container.

Mom has found out that she can't even lift the container off the counter without Charmee goin' completely nuts. It's gonna be a long summer ...

Here's a slide-show of Charmee (and Sparky Fuzzypants) with the bubbles ...

Grandma isn't the steadiest photo-taker, so some of the blurry ones are bein' called "ACTION SHOTS" ...

Fambly on Sunday

You've met my cousin Shadow Saluki ... You visit my cousins Suzanne and Ben2 on a regular basis ... You've been introduced to my cousin Zoey and the three furballs that her mom and dad recently 'dopted ...

Now meet my cousins Gus and Perla (Perla used to be known as Jack before the V-E-T tried to neuter "him" and declared that "he" was actually a GIRL cat) ... Both Gus and Perla live with Zoey's mom's sister up in Oregon. They were recipients of a special Mom-made hammock, too.
This ManCat is Gus:

And this cute little furball (who's related to Gandalf the Grey, Chewbacca, and Smoke) is Perla:

BTW: Their mom is a fan of FLAMINGOS, so we're postin' some flamingo pictures from Sea World San Diego at the end of this post just for them!


Saturday, May 19, 2007

Saturday Photo Hunt #20: COOKED

COOKED (featuring Cookie Monster!)

The Saturday Photo Scavenger Hunt theme for this week is COOKED or COOKING.

I've chosen a photo of those-who-came-before celebrating the eighteenth birthday of Peaches with little boy who lived next door who was named "Tommy". They had just moved in, and his daddy was on WestPac and his momma was eight months pregnant with his little sister, so Mom and Grandma invited him as a guest. He liked kitties and woofies ... but he liked cupcakes more.

The three kitties in the picture (from left to right: Lacey Bunns, Percy, and COOKie Monster) were about eight months old and it was February of 1989. The woofie in the picture is the guest of honor, Peaches.

Mom and Grandma COOKED special cupcakes from carob so that the woofie and kitties could have a treat, too ... It was a really nice thing to do. The party was a success ... Tommy was covered in carob ... and so were the kitties! Peaches ate her cupcake like the lady that she was!

Friday, May 18, 2007

I've signed up for SECRET PAWS ...

... Have YOU?

Visit Diva Kitty and the Fluffies' "Secret Paws" website to find out all of the info for joinin' in! The Summer Secret Paws is gonna be great!

Friday's Feast #20

List 3 emotions you experienced this week.

1. Anxiety
2. Anger
3. Frustration

Name a car you’d love to have.

I'm fond of the "black masheen" that I've owned for fourteen-and-a-half years, but I'd like a Mercedes Benz Kompressor convertible in black with a garage to park it in.

Describe your typical morning routine.

"Woke up ... fell out of bed ... dragged a comb across my head ..." doesn't begin to cover my M-F daily routine.

Six o'clock alarm followed by an inappropriate curse word.
Stumble into the bathroom to go potty, then shower.
Dry off and put nightgown back on.
Make-up and comb wet hair so that it doesn't dry "oddly".
Eat something that won't make me barf and drink half a cup of juice.
Lie back down for a half-hour cuddle with Charmee and DaisyMae.
Seven o'clock alarm.
Maybe hit snooze for nine more minutes.
Dress ... grab school bag and prepacked lunch.
Into car and at school before 7:35 AM.
Get lessons onto boards before greeting 8:05 AM first period class.

Main Course
Have you ever emailed someone famous? If so, who, and what did you say to them? Did they reply?

I emailed "Dear Abby" two days ago hoping to get some national (international?) negative press for Earl Scheib. I haven't heard from Miss "Dear Abby" yet.

Do you listen to podcasts? If so, which ones?

Nope. Not even vaguely interested in a podcast. Probably never will be.

Thursday, May 17, 2007

Thursday Thirteen #20: Embarrassing Nicknames

Some nicknames are endearing like "honey" or "sweetie"; some are physical like "moose" or "pint-size"; and some are just silly like "Chicken Little" or "Scoobs". Livin' with humans, we all seem to pick up a nickname or two. We are no exception:
Mom has spent the last twenty years livin' with Feline Americans, so in honor of OUR twentieth "Thursday Thirteen," I not-so-proudly present ...

The Feline Americans' Most Embarrassing Nicknames ... EVER!

1. Meemaw: Meemorrhoids
2. Cookie Monster: Wussy Cookie Thing
3. Lacey Bunns: Bombs-Away Lace
4. Percy: Perskadicky-Doo
5. Toby: Tobinkus-Binkus
6. Fudge Ripple: Whizzo
7. Dolly Pop: Poop-a-doopolis
8. Huckleberry Finn: Plushy, Plushy Polarberry
9. Cocoa Puff: Heftylumps
10. Sparky Fuzzypants: Spark-o-Lounge Lizard
11. Pumpkin: Punky Munkables
12. Lucky Charmz: Billy the Bun-Kiss
13. DaisyMae Maus: Mousie Butt-Cheeks

Maybe next week's TT will be dedicated to the thirteen nicknames we've given Mom ... What?!? What do you mean by "do you ever wanna eat a Temptation® again"? Is that a threat, Mom?

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Mr. Tasty Face is 50 today!

Happy 50th Birthday, Mr. Tasty Face!

In case you live under a rock or are brand-new-right-this-moment to the blogosphere, Mr. Tasty Face is the man in the lives of Skeezix the Cat, Rocky the Gutter Cat, Maobert (who's on the lam), and Trip the Psycho Stray Cat.

He takes Skeezix for stroller rides all around Castro Valley by the Big Forest, does happy dances in the park while on the look out for vishus deer, makes the Food Lady blissfully happy, and is a role model for "mussel" men efurrywhere.

We wanna join the blogosphere in wishin' Mr. Tasty Face a furry excellent half-century birthday ... Hope you don't burn down the Big Forest with all of those candles (keep the fire extinguisher handy)!

Purrs and smooches from all of us here at DaisyMae Maus and the Feline Americans!

We're declarin' May 16th "Mr. Tasty Face Day"!


Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Tuxie Toozday: Cow-a-Bunga!

Look what Grandma and Grandad took a picture of when they were at Sea World San Diego last week! Yep! Me, too! I couldn't believe that this bovine Tuxie was sportin' Skeezix's pink sunglasses! Too cool, huh?Mooooo ... Uh, I mean ... "Meooowww"!

Monday, May 14, 2007

Tell your 'beans ...

NO GAS...On May 15th 2007

Please tell your 'beans (so that they can tell all of their friends) "don't pump gas on May 15th!"

in April 1997, there was a "gas out" conducted nationwide in protest of gas prices. Gasoline prices dropped 30 cents a gallon

On May 15th 2007, all internet users are to not go to a gas station in protest of high gas prices. Gas is now over $3.00 a gallon in most places (It's $3.49 a gallon at the four stations down the street from my house!).

There are 73,000,000+ American members currently on the internet network, and the average car takes about 30 to 50
dollars to fill up.

If all users did not go to the pump on the 15th, it would take $2,292,000,000.00 (that's almost 3 BILLION) out of the oil companies pockets for just one day, so please do not go to the gas station on May 15th and let's try to put a dent in the Middle Eastern oil industry for at least one day.

''Don't pump gas on May 15th"!

Secret Paws Summer Edition: May 14th

Hey, Efurryone!

Stop by Diva Kitty and the Fluffies' "Secret Paws" bloggie on May 14th to sign up for Secret Paws Summer Edition! They have a special site specifically dedicated to Secret Paws and will start accepting participants beginning next Monday. You don't have to be a kitty to participate; all kinds of animals are welcome to sign up to do Secret Paws. It's furry fun and Diva Kitty's mom does an especially good job matching us up! You can even make a donation to help those less financially fortunate to participate, too! Money is good, but so are gift cards to Petco/PetSmart/WalMart so treats and yarn can be purchased for shelter animals, too!

The bloggie AND ALL THE INFORMATION can be found here: Secret Paws. Mark your calendar and don't forget to sign yourself up for this fun activity!

Sunday, May 13, 2007

What's YOUR "Pet Name"?

What DaisyMae Maus Means

D is for Dewdrop

A is for Angel Face

I is for Incandescent Eyes

S is for Sleepy

Y is for Yummy Lips

M is for Munchkin

A is for All Mine

E is for Enchantment

M is for Monkey Butt

A is for All Mine

U is for Unique One

S is for Sugar Muffin

Happy Mothers' Day, efurry mom!

I wanna wish all of the moms (and Not the Mama, too) a "Happy Mothers' Day" ... Hallmark didn't have the kind of card that I wanted to send to Mom or Grandma, so I searched my way around the 'net to find something worthy of them. I happened across Action Cat where there were quite a few TERRIFIC "from the cat/woofie" animated ecards. At Action Cat, you can select sentiments, backgrounds, colors, and so much more! Stop by and send an ecard to your mom! You can find Action Cat HERE.

On behalf of the Feline Americans and me ...

Happy Mothers' Day to the blogosphere's wonderful moms!

Saturday, May 12, 2007

Our Aunt Annie is furry generous!

Mom brought home some pressies for us on Tuesday (Hey, Toys on Tuesday!) from our Aunt Annie!

Aunt Annie works at Mom's school and has been her friend for thirteen years. She has a woofie named Kirby Upright who is a black lab (and fully lives up to her name!) and a kitty named Dorian Grey (who lives up to his, too!).

When she goes shoppin' for stuff, she always finds the neatest stuff for us, too ... One time it was a whole bunch of miniature tennis balls that we batted all around the kitchen and managed to lodge between the washing masheen and the wall 'til Mom got 'em out.

Another time the present was a HUGE squishy blue kitty cat for us to flop onto.

This time, she found five Fat Cat catnip toys ... one for each of us. Mom let us take a picture of our toys before she took them off of the cardboard backing ... Lucky Charmz licked each of the toys just before Mom lumped them together for this picture. Charmee thinks that he's so clever ... Just wait 'til "Housecat of the Quarter" ...

Saturday Photo Hunt #19: FIVE


The Saturday Photo Scavenger Hunt theme for this week is FIVE. This theme has so many great possibilities:

There are five of us in the Feline Americans.

Mom has five fingers on each hand with which to pet my tummy.

The black masheen is a five-speed (whatever THAT means).

There are five weeks 'til Mom's next vacation ... Like I said, the possibilities are endless!

So, what did I choose? Money.

Mom has a 1926 Indian Head nickel (with a buffalo on the back) that I've sniffed a bunch of times. It's furry old (81 years!!) and has lots of dirt on it from all of the years that it's been in circulation. Mom keeps it safe in a little plastic bag in her security box.

Something that old that is probably worth more than face value should be kept safe, right? That's what Mom said, too ... 'cept somebody actually SPENT it as five cents. And that's how Mom got it.

More than a year ago, Mom was shoppin' in a place called Rancho San Diego east of where we live. Mom bought a bunch of stuff and paid, as usual, with her credit card. The cashier forgot to ring up Mom's water, so she pulled out some cash and paid separately. That special nickel was part of Mom's change from a $1.09 purchase in the garden shop at Target. Mom didn't think anything of the change. She just put it and the receipt for the water in her pocket to deal with later when she finished putting her purchases into the trunk of the black masheen. That special nickel rode around in Mom's pocket for hours until she got home, reached in her pocket, and discovered her 'treasure.'

It's been snuggly ensconced in her security box until now ... She brought it out so that we could take a photo of it and post the photos for this week's theme: FIVE.

Mom let me put the nickel on my Gizzy Quilt for the photos. The Gizzy Quilt photographs spectacularly well; the nickel ... not so much.

Friday, May 11, 2007

Friends on Friday! Skeeter and LC

Since it's "Friends on Friday," why don't you meet a new friend (or two) today?

If you haven't already met our internet/cat blogosphere furriends Skeeter and LC, please stop by. They've been participatin' in memes and writing some furry informative posts about the Big Thing's adventures as an experimental cat chef ... but they haven't met efurryone I'VE met yet and they're kinda starved for comments (I know how THAT can be ... I've dropped to #50! Pitiful! Darn those Russian Maine Coons!)

Stop by their bloggie and add Skeeter and LC to your blogroll. The Big Thing has promised to take more pictures AND download them so that Skeeter and LC can put 'em in their posts!

Oh, and check out the furry excellent bed that the Big Thing has! It's full of WATER, but you don't get all wet! Cool, huh? Skeeter and LC get to sleep on it WHENEVER THEY WANT!


Encore: Seven Random Facts About Me

I keep gettin' tagged and re-tagged by cats in the blogosphere for this meme, so I thought that I'd re-post my original post in the interest of participating and not disappointin' those furry sweet cats who keep taggin' me. Did that make sense?

Seven Random Facts About Me
Luxor tagged me!
Here are the rules for this meme ...

Each player starts with seven random facts about themselves. Cats who are tagged need to write on their own blog about the seven things and the rules. You need to choose seven cats to tag and list their names. Don’t forget to leave them a comment that they have been tagged and to read your blog!

Seven Random Facts About Me:
1) All of my leather is black except my bottom lip which is HOT PINK!
2) I don't like goin' outside ('cuz I used to live there), but I really, really want a stroller.
3) I own a black lead and harness, but instantly fall over and become immobile when Mom puts it on me.
4) I love to rub my whiskers on Mom's satin pillow cases (meeeooowwwww!).
5) When I walk, my midsection moves in the opposite direction as my legs so I look like I'm John Travolta strutting in Saturday Night Fever.
6) I'm ashamed to admit that I have smelled all of the Feline Americans' butts ... more than once.
7) When Mom wants to put Advantage on me or clip my claws, I immediately run into the bedroom and jump onto the bed. Mom instantly catches me and has her way with me (no, not THAT way!). You'd think that I'd find a more effective hiding place, but somehow I don't.

I will be tagging ...
a. My cousin Ben2 ('cuz Suzanne's probably already been chosen)
b. My cousin Zoey
c. My boyfriend Jake the Chippendude
d. Skeeter from Skeeter & LC
e. Puff from Puff Has Spoken
f. Bogdan from The Morning Scratch
g. Tripper the Psycho Stray Cat

Friday's Feast #19

Tell about a time when you had to be brave.

February 14, 2007 was the most recent time that I had to be truly brave and sacrifice my sense of well-being for a greater good.



That was the day that the man (Criminal? A**hole?) who mugged me on 5/22/2006 was on trial for his freedom and I had to testify in open court. To say that I was thoroughly terrified was an understatement. But justice and protecting society from him (for at least two years) were far more important to me than temporary anxiety.

Which upcoming movie are you excited about seeing?

I'll risk the wrath of the "Pirates" fans ... I'm most excited about "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix." "Harry" isn't fabulous literature, but it is very engaging story-telling. I'm thankful for faithful screenwriters and directors who keep the magic alive on-screen. John Williams' score sends chills up and down my spine ... The whole experience is utterly thrilling.

Name an item you try to always have on hand.

Chlöe perfume.

Main Course
Imagine the most relaxing room you can think of. Now describe it!

It'll seem odd, but it's my classroom immediately after 3:15 PM when the kids go home. I have a library-sized book collection, oodles of classical cds, a refrigerator full of beverages/lunches and a microwave to heat whatever I choose, a Bassett executive desk chair, and two fish tanks burbling away. My air conditioner works and my door locks. I have Japanese crane mobiles that students made at my behest and colorful movie posters line the walls. There are days that I lock the door and don't go home until after 7 PM because I'm simply enjoying my environment too much to walk to the parking lot.

To all the teachers out there who have to share classrooms or who have chosen sterile environments rather than personalized ones ... I've definitely got what you're missing and I am making the most of it.

On a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being highest), how spiritual or religious are you?

Religious ... Is zero a choice? I believe in God as an omnipotent force, but I won't blindly follow the words of mortal interpreters. In my experience, people who I've met who prosthelatize at me tend to act in the most hypocritical ways. I prefer to find God in nature rather than in churches.

Spiritual ... About a five. I definitely believe in karma or the balance of the universe. "Doing the right thing" guides my actions. I have a well-defined conscience. But you won't find me dancing naked in the moonlight, hanging crystals everywhere, or experimenting with mind-altering phenomena. That's not me.

Furry Confused on Friday?!?

I was surfin' about the 'net checkin' cat blogosphere postings at my friends' bloggies when I was "misdirected" to this site! I fully intended to go and visit your-best-friend-and-mine, Skeezix the Cat. You know him, right? Wearer of pink ... Eater of Fancy Feast ... Film auteur ... Fashionista ... All-around great cat blogger ...

Anywhoo ... Lookie at where I ended up INSTEAD!

Color me flummoxed, but you could've knocked me over with a fev-ver (mmm ... fev-vers!)

THIS guy is claimin' to be Skeezix the Cat and he even has a bloggie on Blogger with a DOTblogspotDOTcom URL to prove it! What's goin' on? Is the government so interested in findin' Mao that they're infiltrating the blogosphere with phony Skeezixes (or is it Skeez-eye?) hopin' that someone will blow Mao's cover?

See for yourself, intrepid internets ... Skeezix the Cat ...

Thursday, May 10, 2007

Thursday Thirteen #19: In Honor of Mother's Day ...


In honor of Mother’s Day (it’s actually Mother’s Day TODAY in our neighborhood three miles north of the Mexican border), I’m dedicating this Thursday Thirteen to Mom!

Thirteen Things You Might (or Might NOT) Find Interesting About My Mom

1. She’s 5’11” tall which I’m told is pretty tall for a girl. When people ask her if she plays basketball, she asks them if they play miniature golf. She got her degree in sarcasm when she got her Master’s in Counseling Psychology back in ‘93.

2. She was born on Jimi Hendrix’s birthday in 1967, so she’ll be forty this year.

3. Up until age seven, she wanted to be an astronaut ... But then she had to get glasses and her hopes were dashed: No 20-20 vision? No space program!

4. She took tap dancing lessons for eleven years when she was young. She’s still pretty good and sometimes “tappity-taps” in the kitchen in her tap shoes.

5. As a student teacher back in 1990-91, she was chosen “Best All-Around” by the senior class which really put some veteran teachers’ panties in twists.

6. She loves Chlöe perfume and has owned at least one bottle every year since the mid-1980s. It’s her signature fragrance and I like to walk in her wake when she’s just put it on ... It makes my fur smell like her.

7. In a high school class of 425 students, Mom ranked 22nd and graduated with California Scholarship Federation honors (NOW she sponsors the CSF club where she works and has done so for thirteen years).

8. Her favorite candy bar is Milky Way Midnight Dark (but she likes ANY kind of dark chocolate).

9. She likes woofies (not as much as KITTIES, though) and her favorite breeds are the Boston terrier and the French bulldog (‘cuz she’ll never have a Cock-a-poo as wonderful as Peaches ... sniff!). I think that she likes Bostons ‘cuz they’re black-n-white like TUXIES!

10. Mom drives a five-speed stickshift black masheen. Valet parking guys always comment on how “girls don’t usually drive stickshifts” to which Mom replies, “The talented ones do ...”.

11. Mom has a photographic memory which came in really handy in college, but even more so today when her students claim that they can’t find the answer ... “Look halfway down the seventh page in the chapter beneath the map of ... “. They don’t get away with much!

12. She’s selectively lactose intolerant, but severely allergic to alcohol products including cough syrup ... Her throat swells closed and she cannot breathe/swallow.

13. Her favorite movie is “An American President” ... the precursor to one of her all-time favorite television series: “The West Wing.” Her favorite episode? “Excelsis Dei” ... She bawls through the last ten minutes.

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Tagged for a MEME! Seven Random Facts About Me!

Seven Random Facts About Me
Luxor tagged me!
Here are the rules for this meme ...

Each player starts with seven random facts about themselves. Cats who are tagged need to write on their own blog about the seven things and the rules. You need to choose seven cats to tag and list their names. Don’t forget to leave them a comment that they have been tagged and to read your blog!

Seven Random Facts About Me:
1) All of my leather is black except my bottom lip which is HOT PINK!
2) I don't like goin' outside ('cuz I used to live there), but I really, really want a stroller.
3) I own a black lead and harness, but instantly fall over and become immobile when Mom puts it on me.
4) I love to rub my whiskers on Mom's satin pillow cases (meeeooowwwww!).
5) When I walk, my midsection moves in the opposite direction as my legs so I look like I'm John Travolta strutting in Saturday Night Fever.
6) I'm ashamed to admit that I have smelled all of the Feline Americans' butts ... more than once.
7) When Mom wants to put Advantage on me or clip my claws, I immediately run into the bedroom and jump onto the bed. Mom instantly catches me and has her way with me (no, not THAT way!). You'd think that I'd find a more effective hiding place, but somehow I don't.

I will be tagging ...
a. My cousin Ben2 ('cuz Suzanne's probably already been chosen)
b. My cousin Zoey
c. My boyfriend Jake the Chippendude
d. Skeeter from Skeeter & LC
e. Puff from Puff Has Spoken
f. Bogdan from The Morning Scratch
g. Tripper the Psycho Stray Cat

Thanks, Mom ...

Since today, May 9, 2007, is the National Day of the Teacher, I'd like to take this moment (and this forum) to say "thanks" to my mom and all of the other kitty and woofie moms and dads out there in the blogosphere who teach as their chosen profession. You have my appreciation and respect.